Wamp doesn't disappoint

Let's hear it for Corker. The sorry s.o.b. is actually living up to his republicrat ideals and calling out Wamp for ear-marking $25 million for the TVA ash clean-up. Wamp's reasoning, he doesn't believe TVA customers should pay for the clean up. Instead he wants EVERY citizen to share in the costs. So let's make that clear, under his proposal our fellow citizens, nationwide, will share the cost. We (TVA customers) won't get away from it, we'll just force a portion of it onto our fellow citizens. THIS IS AS HYPOCRITICAL AS ANYTHING I'VE EVER SEEN COME FROM WAMP. Yet another reason I will do whatever I can to ensure he does not become our next governor.

the daily commute

Please, please Chattanooga learn to freakin' drive. It seems like people get behind the wheel and lose all perspective. People are impatient, distracted, rude and all to often dangerous. I hear complaints all the time about traffic but, after 2 years in Orlando, it takes a lot more than a little whining to touch a nerve. What really gets my attention are the crazed soccer moms and professional shoppers. I have to control myself, especially when I see one of them going down the road, applying make-up, talking on the phone, while trying to drink there coffee and puff on a cig. I tried to take a picture this morning as proof but realized that would be hypocritical if I took photos on my phone while driving. Suffice to say left hand held both coffee and cigarette, while draped over steering wheel. In crook of left shoulder & ear was her cell phone. Vanity mirror flipped down with lights shining, face stretched to within inches of mirror while with her right hand she attempted to apply something to her eyes. While driving down ashland terrace, thru red bank, up morrison springs and onto 27, she continued this process. As she reached the top on the ramp she hit the gas and took off. Now I was going 70 (5 over) & she blew around me like a bolt. And what was she driving you ask? A brand new lexus suv, still had the dealership temp tag.

I have lived & worked in two much larger cities than Chattanooga, specifically Nashville & Orlando. Both have their own problems but most of those can be directly attributed to population. But what is funny is that in both towns people seemed to adapt to the local traffic patterns and we all move along. The only time I ever got nervous on the road was when I saw a fully loaded-down tourist mini-van or suv. Inevitably they would be in the wrong lane or almost miss their exit, then at the last minute STOP in the middle of the road & turn on their blinker or try to dash across 4 lanes at once. Now especially on the highways (the I-4 parking lot & the 408), it was even considered briefly to ticket anyone in the inside lane for not doing at least the speed limit. If you were in the fast lane you went 10 over, PERIOD. You did not pass on the right, EVER. With 99% of the population following these simple guide lines, a populace many times larger than Chatt & our outlying communities was able to get to work each day. Not to say there were no problems but back ups, detours, accidents, bad weather, ... all were accepted and people moved on. You learned to be a responsible driver, you listened to traffic reports & choose your routes accordingly. That's probably why radio in Orlando was such big business, because so much of the population listened daily. Little shit rolled off your shoulders, and everyone sanity was maintained.

So with my bitching out of the way I give you my rules for the road:

1. Inside lane = at least 5 mph over the limit*

2. Cell phones are only to be used with hands-free devices (outlawing entirely is a joke)

3. NEVER pass on right

4. If you are not going to at least do the speed limit, stay off interstates and highways.*

5. NO MULTI-TASKING

6. Blinkers aren't the law everywhere but they are polite, use them!

*~ except in bad weather

And my personal rule of thumb never more than 5 mph over or under the speed limit.* I chose to follow this rule for a couple reasons. Most importantly I don't like cops, nothing personal I just don't need a ticket or any other extra expense right now. My preference is never to break more than one law at a time and if I speed, well that just draws more attention to me than I like. Also because by limiting my speed I conserve gas. Not a lot I'm sure but I do get a few extra miles out of a tank if I control the ball bearing in my right ankle. And by limiting my speed I have a firm frame of reference as to how long trips take. If I know my speed then the only other variables are distance and traffic. Both of with can be measured and anticapated. Not exactly but you learn how to compare rush hour to morning drive.

Back with a Vengeance

Superintendent Scales showed uncanny reasoning and prowess when he elegantly stated that the new HCSB (Hamilton county school board) budget process would be rife with politics. Well no shit Sherlock. Since when has any spending of public funds not been political. Just because of a few elections in 2010, doesn't change the fact that the HCDE budget (or lack there-of) is a mess. I'm just loving this budget committee fiasco that has been formed. The Board already knows that it must make cuts. But because they are a bunch of pantie wastes, instead of doing the job they were elected to do they appoint a committee of 'private' citizens to suggest the cuts and ultimately take the blame for making the tough choices.
Let's look at our time scopes into the near future. The budget committee (BC) has presented the budget with x school closings and x layoffs. They'll go before the cameras & microphones, tell a weepy story of tough choices made in our children' best interests. Then election time rolls around and the HCSB lays all the blame for the cuts and out of work teachers squarely on the committee's shoulders. Never mind that the mess is one they, the board, has been slowly amassing for years. They keep wanting more magnet schools and more technology they're spending is from some fantasy funding they don't have. Yeah, we have lottery funds but it can only be spent on building and scholarships.
Here is a radical idea, it requires a constitutional amendment but it is so worth it. How about we take the lottery building funds and use it to pay teachers' (no administrators, only classroom teachers) salaries, to buy books and to repair our current schools instead of building new ones? You know, spend it responsibly. I know that is a foreign concept to most politicians but keeping a BALANCED budget is possible.
But just so Scales isn't disappointed, who else is for a nice, friendly game of throw the bums out. Let's get together for these next elections and wipe out the lot of them and start from scratch with individuals who actually give a shit.

Ex-letters

Girls, explain this to me. Why does one of yours like to pour salt in old wounds? My ex-fiance likes to shoot me an e-mail or facebook message every couple months, my question is why?

First off let me explain; we started dating in college, after 18 months I graduated and moved to Florida. We tried long-distance and it seemed to work for the 1.5 years I was in FL. We got engaged and started planning. I moved back to TN 2 months before her graduation. I was sick and tired of being lonely and was ready to be back. I spent my weekends in murfreesboro with her. 2 weeks after returning she starts acting real frumpy, being very down trodden. She soon dumps me. One of the biggest reasons I came back was for her. I missed her and thought she missed me. Not to mention her biggest concern about marriage (that she told me) was moving to FL and leaving her family. I was willing to give up a well paying job with a multi-national corporation in a beautiful city to make her happy. She just apparently was to 'scared' to admit she was having doubts. If she had said that a couple months sooner I wouldn't have been in a hurry to come back like I did. I think I would have eventually anyways, but I could have made better plans and saved myself a lot of frustration.

Anyways back to my point, why does she insist on keeping sending me messages. I tried at first to be friendly. Maybe she still needs some sort of closure or validation over a guilty conscience. But whatever the reason, she shoots me these messages asking all sorts of friendly questions. So I respond politely never even bringing up the past, trying to show no hard feelings (they are there but that is my issue to deal with not hers.) But each time I respond, this seemed to be enough and its quite again for another month or two.

What sort of schizo, hair-brained lunacy is this? Can she not make up her mind as to why she needs to keep in contact. We live 100 miles apart so its not likely to bump into one another, is this just her way of staying 'friends.' If so it sucks, friends carry on conversations not just send one sided messages every couple months. Please, please someone clue me in! I know my Y-chromosome makes it difficult to explain things to me but will someone, anyone, please try.

Update - today 3-5-09, I received a padded letter from my ex. Not an email, a first class package with my old fraternity letters & some pictures she took on her last visit to Chattanooga.

Dept. of Incompetents

Chattanooga's Police

What has happened to law enforcement? Gone are the days of Mayberry & respectable law enforcement, now we live in the era of corruption & greed. All it takes is turn on the news, when they aren't describing the proliferation of crime, to witness an extensive history of moral corruption in law enforcement. The endless debate of a few bad apples ruining the bunch is moot. When ever a so-called honest officer turns his back on his duty to protect a law breaker then he becomes one too. The officers who claim lack of respect is why they are edgy are blowing smoke. Attitude reflects leadership- as individuals in a position of authority it is your responsibility to EARN the trust of the public by enforcing all laws equally and justly. I purposefully failed to say fairly because 'fair' is to subjective of a term.
Now if you are one of the truly honest officers then let me say thank you. You might annoy me sometimes but that in no way lessens my respect for the work you do. To the rest of you, if you decide toharass me make sure you in no way violate my rights. Because I know what they are & I have no problem standing up for them, even in court if necessary.

Have you completed your DDF's?

What are DDF's you ask? Daily Dick Flexes... No kidding, think of it as kagels ?sp? for dudes. The theory is that by 'flexing' the muscles in your penis, just like any muscle will increase blood flow, and just as muscles are stressed during exercise and then repair themselves to become stronger. By applying the same theory to the love muscle your are supposed to experience longer lasting erections, as well as be able to train yourself to 'release' on command. There is supposedly growth as well but I think that is just wishful thinking on the part of the guys who came up with this. But since the theory is sound, the penis is just one big muscle after all, it might be worth a shot.
All you are supposed to do, while sitting and standing (different muscles are engaged based on posture), is flex/contract/whatever & release the muscles in the area at a slow, steady pace. Contract for 5 seconds, release for 5 seconds, is one rep. 25 reps, 2-3 times a day.
What will scientists decide to research next, better asshole control to prevent passing gas in public?